day 62

i have been looking forward all week for this weekend because me and ying ying would finally have some time to talk. work and time difference really limited our to a few messages and calls during the whole week and video chatting for a long time would have offset all of those. but i guess things sometimes  don't work out the way you want it to. it's really frustrating when this things happen but you should not let it get to you because it will just make the situation worse. arguing would be last thing you want to happen and definitely one of the bad things that you have to avoid when you are in a long distance relationship. i guess talking would have to be on hold for a bit more than i wanted. just think of it this way, as long as the love is there, he/she would have chosen to talk to you is he/she had a choice.

since i was not able to talk to her, i decided to get some air and played basketball and later on jogged with a friend at UP diliman (a university). it was enlightening to hear her side about long distance relationship and i must say i could use some of the advice that she has given me. trust should always be there in a long distance relationship. if you asked a question to your partner, you have to believe what he/she said and trust him/her for it. otherwise, do not ask the question if you would not believe his/her answer. always end your conversation, messages, and chats with i love and i miss you. it's not there as a insignificant phrase that you have to write for the sake of putting it there. it is a constant reminder about what you feel for him/her. always try to understand that given the distance, your situations would be very different. take into consideration that things that might be easy for you like finding time to chat with him/her might be the opposite for him/her. do not let frustration get the better of you. instead, let him/her know in a nice way what you feel. do not confront her about what you feel without asking his/her side or reasons first. being in an offensive mode at the start of the conversation might end up blowing in your face and backfiring. you end up with a bigger problem when in the first place, all you would have wanted him/her to know was you miss him/her and you love him/her. try to put yourself in his/her situation so that you would understand him/her better. learning and understanding the other one's situation would make you deal with future issues better and in turn, would avoid confrontations.

learn from your mistakes and quarrels. any kind of relationship will have a plethora of it's own problems. it's unavoidable that sometimes you have to argue with him/her. no matter how compatible you are, there would always be personal differences...may it be color, how you want your food, how you want to drive, etc. respect each other for it and accept it. they were there in him/her before you arrived, and it will stay there forever. do not force her to change into something that you want him/her to be. he/she will only hold it against you if things would go wrong.

there are a lot of things i realized that i could write about long distance relationship. if time permits, i would look forward writing about them. i really like the feeling every time i finish writing. i always end up feeling better before i would start the blog. only a handful of friends know about this blog. not even ying ying knows that this blog about her exists. i don't know if i would end up deciding about letting her know about it. but for now, the more important thing is that writing about how i miss her makes me feel better. whenever i would tell a friend about my blog, the initial reaction would always be: shocked-in denial-laugh-ask me if it's for real-laugh again-and say i am really in love with her for creating this blog. again, they know how much a sporty guy i am and a personal blog about missing ying ying would be the last thing they would associate with me. but love can make people do stuff that they least expect. when you are in love, everything around her would be a blur, you are just focused on how to make her feel loved, important, and happy and you don't care how much you are making a fool out of yourself :)

next time...maybe next time we will finally have the time to talk longer but for now, i should not give in to frustration. i will be patient and understanding :) i love her and i miss her a lot...